PARADISE LOST? NOT NECESSARILY...

In this economy, it's easy to feel the pinch when it comes to budgeting a wedding and honeymoon. For those who are lucky enough to have parents or friends "gift" them a honeymoon, sometimes there is even more pressure to find a honeymoon spot that won't "break the bank" or cost too much.

A few months ago, TallGuy and I traveled to Hawaii--we almost went there for our honeymoon, so we decided to go there as our next "big" trip.

For the first part our trip, we stayed in the beautiful island of Kauai. Only in Kauai can you see something like this image, which is what we saw aerially from a Blue Hawaiian helicopter.

The B&B we stayed at was absolutely breathtaking - and surprisingly affordable (of course, relative to other luxurious honeymoon spots).

The Dilly Dally House in Kapaa (the eastern region of Kauai) overlooks beautiful mountains, is away from everything, and is a completely luxurious and fantastic retreat With home cooked breakfasts, beautiful views, and gracious husband and wife team hosting us, TallGuy and I had a fantastic time.

We stayed in the Cottage, which was separate from the main house (and had its luxurious own outdoor shower!). As the most expensive option, the Cottage was $185.00/night -- the least expensive room in the house (which looks amazing on the website) is $115.00/night.

With only 4 rooms in the entire property, this was an intimate and amazing getaway - in fact, most of the couples we met during our time there were young and on their honeymoons!

Just wanted to throw this out there for those looking for somewhere exotic that isn't over the top, price wise. As for getting to Hawaii? That may be a different story :)

Stay tuned!

SHOWER/BLETTE COMBOS = MAKING THINGS CONVENIENT FOR YOU AND OUT OF TOWNERS

Coordinating schedules and getting people in one place- for a shower/bachelorette party- can be a logistical nightmare.

Oftentimes, friends and family are scattered about the country (or coming in from another one!), and it's important to remember this - even when you as the bride are not planning the activities.

So what happens if a lot attendees are from out of town? My suggestion? Combine, combine, combine.

For people traveling, it's great to fly in for the bachelorette party on a Saturday night, and then go to the shower on the day following.

Alternatively - think you're b-party will be too rowdy, leaving you hungover and tired to meet your parents' friends the following day? Have your b-party on a Friday, and the shower on a Sunday. That leaves you room for down-time and hanging out w/ out of towners on Saturday.

Keep the lines of communication open with your MOH or whomever is planning the events. Don't rest on your I'm the bride" laurels!

If your friends are relaxed and not stressed about coming in for an event - the more fun they will have - and the more fun you will have, too!

Stay tuned!

KEEPING IT REAL: NON "WEDDING BAND-Y" WEDDING BANDS

Remember the wedding band from the movie "Old School?"

So awesome. And so amazing. For a movie (not sure you want grandma listening to that band's version of "Total Eclipse of the Heart").

But I've heard of some major wedding band nightmares in the real world (playing the wrong songs, doing weird and random shout-outs, or generally "cheesing it up"), and I think the first and most important rule of thumb when choosing a wedding band is this:

Would YOU love this band - as a guest - if it were playing at someone else's wedding?

Wedding bands tend to live up to their name - and not in a good way.

I love wedding bands that don't sound like wedding bands. And that's what I think makes a wedding band great.

I was reading in the New York Times about The Dexter Lake Club Band, and the article was EXACTLY on point with my feelings on the subject. A band that does weddings that isn't a wedding band.

I checked out the band's website, and listened to few of the clips provided. (American Girl = Awesome. Come On Eileen = Awesome).

I have no idea how expensive this band is, but it seems well worth it.

I also love The Touch (and am partial to them since they played at my wedding :)

Just something to keep in mind as you do your search for music....

Stay tuned!

A LESSON FROM ANTM - DON'T BE THAT (UNRECOGNIZABLE) BRIDE

OK. I'll confess. I watch America's Next Top Model (ANTM) more than I'd like to admit.

There's a "Cycle 13" marathon on today - the episode I'm watching now is the "makeover" session -- a "Ty Over" is in the works for each of these wannabe models. ("Ty Over" = a Tyra Banks' makeover -what, you've never heard of this term before? :)

I understand for models that it's important to get a "signature look". (And what's more entertaining on ANTM than the make over episode)?.

As I watched, I started thinking about how many brides end up trying a new hairdo, or wearing completely different makeup, on the day of their weddings -- and end up looking completely different then, well, themselves.


I understand the importance of wanting to look absolutely beautiful and amazing on the day of your wedding. Just make sure you stay true to yourself and, well, LOOK like yourself!

Don't get carried away by the idea of having an updo because you think it's more bridal. If you don't normally wear updos, or try it out and think you don't look like yourself? Take it out. Go natural.

Which is NOT to say I don't love updos. I do. And for some brides, they totally work. For me - it totally didn't, and I went with what was comfortable.

Love that MAC makeup shade that they use at your makeup trial - but you feel like something is 'Off"? Go with your instinct.

Bottom line - have a hair/makeup session done long before the wedding, to make sure you get what you want. Or, if you are trying to save money, do your hair/makeup yourself (or have a good friend or family member do it for you).

Guests want to be able to celebrate with the real you - not the you that you think they want to see! A "signature look" may work on a reality show - or even a catwalk - but not for walking down the aisle.

Stay tuned!

GET INSPIRED - IF YOU LOVE "IT," YOUR GUESTS WILL TOO (PART I)

On this beautiful Labor Day, TallGuy and I have been lazing about, watching the US Open on television and hanging out on our apartment's roof deck.

And what better way to relax and enjoy a day off from work than to spend it with TallGuy --and a Crumbs cupcake?

I am a NYC cupcake girl. I always have been, and I always will be. Whether it's Crumbs, Magnolia Bakery, or Buttercup, I am a sucker for the pastel frosting, pretty sprinkles, and sometimes - even candy coating (like the Reeses Peanut Butter Cupcake at Crumbs).

Bottom line - cupcakes are something I love, and for our wedding, they became an accidental source of inspiration and a highlight. What have I learned and hope that brides will take with them? Passions and loves can be found in both expected and unexpected places--and sources of inspiration are everywhere. When you love something and feel strongly about including that detail or item in your wedding, your guests will feel that positive energy.

Thursday before our wedding, I found out that our wedding favor (which was to be a small bag of pastry items/cookies for each guest) fell through. Our "vendor" basically flaked out on us-- and the afternoon before the rehearsal dinner, we were "favor-less".

After a few panicked phone calls to TallGuy and, I admit, several tears, I decided to take a walk to clear my head--and grab a cupcake to console myself.

As I walked towards Crumbs to get a vanilla cupcake w/ rainbow sprinkles (my favorite), I realized that the answer was staring me in the face.

Although I felt that many brides did cupcakes as a favor, I thought to myself "This is something I love. Why shouldn't I!?"

I went home and placed a few calls to different vendors. First Crumbs. Then Magnolia. Then Buttercup.

Buttercup Bake Shop (http://www.buttercupbakeshop.com/) had the best deal for a large assortment of cupcakes, and with their pastel, spring-like colors, I thought they would be a wonderful complement to our spring "english garden" concept.

Oh - AND they could fill an order of 100 cupcakes in 2 days!

The bake shop couldn't deliver them on a weekend, but no matter. My parents were gracious enough to offer their car, and we got them to the Yale Club on time and in one piece.

The cupcakes were a huge hit that evening. Not only did guests stuff bags with cupcakes to take home, many were munching on them while dancing to our amazing band, The Touch.

Many of my friends told me how much they loved the little detail and how "TallGuy and Wedding Fairy" they really were. I was so thrilled.

A last-minute, "gut" decision paid off. While the favor was a little bit more than I would have normally spent, I thought the few extra dollars was worth it.

Having something I absolutely loved at the wedding, even as simply a little detail, was really wonderful, because we felt as if the guests really enjoyed it.

As you plan your wedding, think about your loves and passions--and ways to incorporate them into your day. Even walking down the street can be a source of brainstorming, as the Crumbs storefront was for me.

No matter what you do - realize that when things "go wrong", there is always an answer. Remembering that can keep you as a gracious, level-headed bride, no matter what adversity you face.

Stay tuned! And have a cupcake!

AS AN ASIDE: SOMETHING SWEET

I was looking at Martha Stewart weddings, and I came across an adorable and a little bit off-the-beaten path wedding favor.

Made out of sugar cookies. Yum yum yum.

Martha suggests stacking basic sugar cookies to look like baby wedding cakes. Icing fastens the "layers" of the cake, and all is topped off with sugar flowers. Cute packaging seals the cakes with class.

Sweet and sugary favors are always a big hit!

Click here for the recipe.

http://www.marthastewartweddings.com/portal/site/ww/menuitem.9da96f5acde0a93df8aeef105173a0a0/?vgnextoid=87b0cf06cd80f010VgnVCM1000003d370a0aRCRD&vgnextfmt=default

Enjoy and stay tuned!

WEDDING DRESS SHOPPING: RIDICULOUSNESS VS. GRACIOUSNESS (PART III)

This is the moment.

This is the moment I remembered so vividly before the wedding ceremony, when I realized that everyone in attendance would finally get to see "the dress".

Maybe it wasn't such a big deal to everyone else, but it was a big deal to me. After months and months of searching, I finally found "the one". While it took me 3 return visits to commit (as "the one" was a little over budget), I knew that my Oscar de la Renta ballroom gown was one of the most important elements of the wedding planning.

And, right before I walked down the aisle with my father, this was the scene. This was the moment. And I was so excited to see TallGuy down that aisle, and walk proudly down the aisle to "the one" IN "the one".

Therefore, I UNDERSTAND how stressful finding a dress really can be. All I can say it this; no matter how you get there, you'll get there. I definitely had not-so-positive bridal gown shopping experiences (at places about which I had heard nothing but amazing things).

But - you will get there. You will get to that moment. And when you walk down the aisle, you will be in "the one" which is "your one". I can promise you that.

Stay tuned!

WEDDING DRESS SHOPPING: RIDICULOUSNESS VS. GRACIOUSNESS (PART II)

My future sister-in-law (I'll call her BroadwayGal (for her love of Broadway shows)), my mom, and I went to Saks a few Saturdays ago, as BroadwayGal wanted to show us an amazing Vera Wang dress that she had seen at the store on her first visit.

BroadwayGal had told me that her first visit to Saks was not the most positive. In fact, the saleslady (who I call, instead of "Cruella deVille" - "Cruella de Saks") was rather rude, and questioned BroadwayGal as to why, in heavens, she had not looked at bridal magazines and clipped photographs of dresses for her visit to the store.

BroadwayGal's reaction (and I'm paraphrasing here)? "Why should I be questioned about how much "research" I've done? Why can't someone just be happy to help me and work with me, based on what I've seen or not seen?"

I don't think any bride should be made to feel as if she hasn't done her "homework" when it comes to looking at dresses. I know that I was NOT looking for a ballgown dress. Yet, I ended up buying one--regardless of the fact that I was looking for an empire waisted dress!

So, not everything is as it seems when it comes to dresses and trying them on. AND, even more so, not everything is as it seems when it comes to professional and well-thought of bridal boutiques.

It seems that things could only get worse with Cruella. See below for a list of the faux pas-ness which was going on that day:

1. First, Cruella de Saks did not offer to have my mom and I sit down, while BroadwayGal was in the dressing room trying on the Vera Wang, and a few others that she wanted to show us. Cruella, after realizing we were standing for several minutes, made a half hearted attempt to find us a chair. That lasted about 5 seconds, but then she went to attend to something (or someone) else.

The "someone else" is #3 of this list, below. After about 15-20 minutes of my mom and I getting tired of standing, especially after my mom noticed an empty dressing room -- with chairs -- adjacent to the dressing room BroadwayGal was in -- my mom made the unfortunate mistake of going into the dressing room and sitting in a chair.

Cruella came dashing over (from where, who knows, since she was supposed to be attending to BroadwayGal), and basically chastised my mother for going into a room "of someone who has an appointment". The mystery woman with the appointment, shockingly, never showed up while we were there. We were absolutely amazed that Cruella had the audacity to throw us out of a dressing room that no one was in - at least for the time being - or even offer us 1 measly chair from said room! My mom and I would have shared!

Now, listen. I am NOT a high maintenance girl. I'm really not. And my mother is not a high maintenance woman. Having said that, I don't think it's unreasonable for a salesperson who is SUPPOSED TO BE doting on someone you care about- and who may spend thousands of dollars with that person - to offer basic seating - especially to a 65 year old woman.

I ended up sitting on the floor. No joke.

2. Cruella de Saks may also have been David Blaine in a woman's body- as she was really good at disappearing into the back room. BroadwayGal was inside the dressing room, struggling to get into certain of the dresses (those clips can be a bitch!), and Cruella was no where to be found. Was she watching Beverly Hills 90210? Performing some mystical ritual in the back? Playing tennis? We weren't really sure, but what we WERE sure of is that there was absolutely no attention paid to us whatsoever.

3. When Cruella DID emerge, she made the unfortunate mistake of showing us JUST how uninterested she was with being a part of BroadwayGal's experience. A mother/daughter team, which definitely did not have an appointment, showed up at Saks bridal in order to buy a veil. They were obviously well heeled, well monied, and well prepared to make a purchase - and Cruella made sure that they had a seat in the dressing room area, and were attended to by Cruella herself.

THE NERVE!

Not to be ignored or mistreated, and certainly not to have my future sister-in-law ignored or mistreated, I was "this" close to saying something.

But then I had a better plan.

After the dress appointment ended, and BroadwayGal showed us the Vera Wang she loved (which we loved too), I suggested that she call Joan from Bergdorf's, and see if Joan could order the very same dress to her store. That way, BroadwayGal could work with someone professional, poised, elegant, and EFFECTIVE - instead of giving Cruella the satisfaction of a commission which she did not earn.

BroadwayGal called Joan up, and that was that. While BroadwayGal didn't end up with the Vera Wang dress (and instead chose an even more beautiful option!), we all learned a lesson that day about the varying levels of customer service that come with wedding dress shopping.

All wedding dress stores are not created equal - and those which you think may be wonderful could, in fact, turn out to be the very opposite (and vice versa).

It's amazing how competitive and tough this industry can be. It may test even the most gracious and patient bride-to-be. But if you can get through experiences like these with a smile on your face (even while gritting your teeth!), you'll be all the more prepared for the next hurdle.

Stay tuned!